Documentation is like sex: when it is good, it is very, very good; and when it is bad, it is better than nothing.

War is like love; it always finds a way.

What happens to the hole when the cheese is gone?

All technology should be assumed guilty until proven innocent.

Take away the right to say "fuck" and you take away the right to say "fuck the government."

You will never find time for anything. If you want time you must make it.

An honest politician is one who, when he is bought, will stay bought.

How far you go in life depends on your being tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving and tolerant of the weak and strong. Because someday in your life you will have been all of these.

Rest in peace. The mistake shall not be repeated.

Historians are like deaf people who go on answering questions that no one has asked them.

The soul would have no rainbow had the eyes no tears.

It may be that our role on this planet is not to worship God--but to create him.

There are two types of people--those who come into a room and say, "Well, here I am!" and those who come in and say, "Ah, there you are."

Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope.

Human beings are the only creatures that allow their children to come back home.

You may be deceived if you trust too much, but you will live in torment if you do not trust enough.

A good listener is a good talker with a sore throat.

Exterminate.

The only difference between me and a madman is that I am not mad

When a dog bites a man that is not news, but when a man bites a dog that is news.